I am normally an out-of-hospital birthing momma that has a preference for birthing at home but in 2016 while being a surrogate for my lovely friends we decided that, for this particular birth, hospital was the route we wanted! Once you have birthed outside of the hospital and experience the freedom to listen to your own body instead of following "hospital policy" it's hard to go back to thinking about birthing the way I once did in a hospital setting. So we made the decision that we wouldn't. We wouldn't settle for the drive-through-window experience that is often birth in the US. I stayed upright and moved as my body wished, I ate and my nurses happily spoiled me with food, I wore my favorite maternity dress that made me feel comfortable, I didn't feel a loss of control over my body at any moment, the staff actually READ my birth plan and knew it! Not once did anyone offer to check me or offer me pain meds (as per my birth preference paper requests). The staff and my lovely Midwife, Annie, stood back and followed my lead. I also gave birth to baby squatting on our hospital room floor while hanging from the squat bar. This wasn't some unicorn birth, this birth is possible to ANYONE! You CAN have the experience that you may think is only available to homebirthing women! I had what I consider to be a perfect birth minus my own bed and comfort of home lol! Here are some tips that can help! 1. Choosing you provider with your birth experience in mind. This is definitely number one for a reason. The provider you choose can definitely determine the birth you have. There are so many kind, caring, nice providers in this area but while these are great qualities they are not the ONLY things you are looking for in a health care provider. As a Doula I have worked with most providers in this area and the mass majority are amazing people! They got into this profession because they love helping women! While this is great, I can't stress enough that there is MORE that we are looking for. First, look at your birth preferences, then make sure that your provider is not only on board but supportive of these preferences. Birth can sometimes be unpredictable and when different situations arise we must be willing to compromise but in the scenario where the labor/birth is uncomplicated and low-risk does your provider support your wishes? To read about our favorite in-hospital providers click here! 2. Have informed "backup" plans for each possible scenario. Yes, we all prefer that smooth and hang-up free birth with no surprises and no change-of-plans but sometimes we are thrown a curve ball. What are your preferences if you test positive for Group B strep? In the rare case of a cesarean, what are your preferences? These curve balls do not mean that we no longer have options. You have options in ALL birth scenarios! Learn them! 3. Have extremely open communication with your birth team. I feel like sometimes, as moms, we can have a hard time being blunt and honest with our providers. We can sometimes feel shy or nervous making our wishes known but this is SO important!!! How can our providers help us the way we want if they don't know what we want? Also, before we can properly gauge if they are the right providers for us, we must see how they feel about all of our preferences. "Going in blind" is leaving yourself open for surprises on your big day! I went to my Midwife, Annie, with a list of my needs. Some were very important and some were less important but I told her ALL if them. She never stopped smiling and said "well, of course!" after my looong list. This doesn't have to be a big scary thing! 4. Never be afraid to change providers if it's not love. Ask any mother who has changed providers mid-pregnancy and they will tell you that not only was it easy, it was necessary for them and they were happy they did it! We have this preconceived notion that once we hire someone that it is a permanent thing. That changing providers will completely turn our world upside-down and will cause much grief. This is so incorrect. In fact, changing providers is quick and painless! You may need to fill out some "new client" forms but that's the extent of the trouble! Never be afraid to leave a situation with a provider that's working against you instead of FOR you. Remember YOU hire your birth team. They work for you! 5. Walk into your birth informed and confident in your body's ability to birth.
Your Doula will do an amazing job and giving all the fact-based information you would like about anything your heart desires! Your Doula knows that with education comes confidence. We want you to have the evidence to back up your knowledge and with this comes power. Your body already knows how to birth this baby, our job is to help you discover this and to realize the powerful and wise birthing goddess you are! You want to eat in labor? We will show you the new recommendations in favor of this from the World Health Organization You want to squat while pushing? We will show you evidence on birthing positions! You want your Doula with you at all times? We will show you the ACOG recommendation in favor of Doulas! Knowledge is power! 6. Don't feel that you need to settle for 1 or 2 requests just because you are birthing in a hospital. These amazing, raw, primal experiences aren't just for out-of-hospital births! You can still do most of the things that your friends do while birthing at home with the right mindset, knowledge, and team behind you! Many women will think "I'd love to eat and birth out of bed but my main concern is to birth naturally. I'll only focus on my most important requests and let the others go since I can't be too picky." Why can't you be picky? Why don't you deserve the same experience? Guess what? You do! I'm not saying it will be easy to find the right birth team to help you achieve this but it's definitely possible! Don't settle for less than you deserve!
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Hi. I am Talesha Carter. I am a wife and mama to two awesome kids and one fur baby. I am a firm believer in creating the life you desire, and I can often be found with my nose in a book learning new ways to improve. I love to go on adventures with my family and explore new places. When tough times come my way, I turn to God and energy healing and I always find my way. Life is meant to be enjoyed, not endured! It is my mission to uplift, strengthen and empower hearts. I am an energy healer who practices as a Reiki Master and educator in Logan, Utah. My business, Foster Vitality was created to help women, like myself, release stress, anxiety, fear, anger and worthlessness to help them be the best they can be. I know from personal experiences that living with feelings like these can wreak havoc on relationships. And leave us feeling alone. Nearly four years ago I brought home a beautiful baby girl. Miss C had soft curly brown hair, and squishy cheeks, and her eyes glowed. She had that wondrous fresh baby smell, and I couldn’t believe she was mine. But I had a secret that took me years to admit. Have you ever kept something buried deep within you out of fear and shame of what others may think of you? I didn’t dare speak a word. On some levels I don’t think I understood the depth of my anguish. My mind has this great default button called the subconscious, and I know it blocked out many of the emotions I felt so that I didn’t become a complete shut-in. My secret was that I did not feel those ooey gooey “you’re my child” connection feelings. I have a son who is a couple years older than Miss C. Because of him I knew how I was supposed to feel, and I didn’t. I felt alone, disconnected, and fearful that something was wrong with me. From the outside my life was what would be described as a cookie cutter life. I had two beautiful children, a husband that had a great job that allowed me to stay home, we had a cozy apartment and lots of family nearby. But, these things didn’t change how I felt. I was not connecting to Miss C. I felt I didn’t know how to take care of her. I felt I was not a good mom to her. I was spinning in a world of grief, depression, anxiety, and fear. My sweet baby would cry and I wanted to help her but unlike with her brother I didn’t know what she needed, and the only thing that worked was her daddy. Looking back on that time with healthy eyes, I can recognize the depression for what it was. However, in the moment I thought I was a failure a failure to myself and my Miss C. Do you have feelings similar to this? Do you feel like something is broken inside of you? I feel your pain, and I know the destruction you’re battling. You’re not alone. I have hope for you! I began searching online for classes, or groups. Something that I could “busy” myself with. One particularly rough afternoon I was searching our community calendar. My soul jumped. I found an introduction to energy work course and although I had no idea what it was, I signed myself up. I like to refer to this time as my journey, because it was the time I went from a depressed shell of a person to a person who helps others heal from their emotional and physical pain. That is right- heal. There is healing, and it doesn’t require you to be drugged up on medication and miss out on more connecting opportunities with your child. As I mentioned above, I am a Reiki Master. This is a modality of energy healing. With Reiki I am able to help you relax and tap into your life force energy. What does this mean? We are energetic beings. This energy that flows through you and I is referred to as life force energy. When you become stressed, worried, or sick, this energy flows at a slower rate. Likewise when you are happy, fulfilled, and love yourself, this energy is much higher. If you feel like you are not connecting with your child, that you’re alone, anxious, fearful or consumed with guilt your life force energy is going to be flowing at a slower rate. There is no shame in having these feelings. It means you’re a living, breathing person. There is hope. Reiki can help you. Reiki heals by charging the affected body parts with positive energy, allowing your body to heal the way that it was originally designed to. It raises your vibratory level. This causes the negative emotions to break apart and fall away. Reiki then clears, heals, and straightens energy pathways, which allows the life force energy to flow in a natural way. You can receive the benefits of Reiki. It will relax you, open new energy pathways, open your heart and mind, release negative emotions, and help you find clarity, peace, and acceptance. The greatest benefit that I have felt and seen from receiving regular Reiki treatments is the ability to love myself and others with fewer judgments. Practice today. Hold one hand over your heart. Feel your heartbeat. Feel your lungs increase with air. Feel them lower as you exhale. Think about the stress you feel in your heart, the worries and burdens you’re holding onto. Think, or say the words, “I give myself permission to release these feelings into my hands.” Take a deep breath in and on your exhale take your hand off your heart and shake it out while picturing those feelings leaving your hands. This feeling of release, feeling like you’re lighter, this is only a fraction of what you will feel with an entire Reiki session. Healing is possible. You do not need to put up with those nasty thoughts and feelings. You can connect to your child. You can feel happy, and you can feel intense love! For more information about Reiki, what it is, how it works, and who can benefit from a session, I invite you to go to my website, fostervitality.com, and contact me with any questions. With love, Talesha This week's Guest Blogger is from our dear friend, fellow advocate for empowering births and families, and an alternative healing practitioner. Mally Griffin is also a Wife, Mama to two sweet baby girls, Certified Foot Zonologist, SimplyHealed Energy Practitioner and Soon-to-Be RYT-200. She is located in Logan, Utah. More info at her website here. Hello, all! I am so excited to share with you how Energy Healing can benefit us mamas in such phases of life. After two miscarriages, I was led to the SimplyHealed Method of Energy Healing and I can say with confidence that it was one of the key factors in my conception, healthy pregnancy and birth of my second child. Here’s my top few tips and reasons why everyone should look into a bit of energy healing while pregnant, trying to conceive, and in preparation for labor and delivery. Sacral Chakra Clearing (Hello, Conception!) The Chakra System is one of your main energy systems and consists of seven (main) energy centers. Each Chakra has specific characteristics and deals with specific issues. Many, if not most women who are struggling to conceive have energetic blocks in their Sacral Chakra. Clearing low-vibrations, traumas and past issues help to make their reproductive system a happy and fertile home for that future sweet babe to come into! Clearing the Sacral Chakra is also extremely helpful in preparation for labor and delivery. Generational Issues Resolved (Hi, Happy Baby!) We all have a Mother, Aunt, Grandma, Sister or Cousin that has told you their “horror” birth story. And if you don’t, odds are that somewhere up your family tree, someone had a bit of a rough time in the labor and delivery department. Pregnancy and Labor can be (and should be) THE most beautiful and empowering experience in a woman’s life. However, that’s not always the case for people. What most women don’t realize is that sometimes our relative’s “stories” or experiences of trauma can become genetically encoded and passed down through the DNA. (The field of study that is now proving this “theory” is called EpiGenetics). Our predecessor’s fears, false beliefs, and/or phobias can come down through this network and manifest themselves in their descendants (us!). Many women who have irrational fears of pregnancy or labor and delivery suffer from these negative Generational Issues. We then continue to pass on this Fear Cycle to our babies in utero. Clearing Generational Issues is crucial for a happy momma and happy baby. Meridian Balancing (Goodbye, Morning Sickness!) Meridian Lines run throughout your entire body. Each one links to specific organs and specific emotions. When these get a little “criss-crossed” they can cause a myriad of issues in pregnancy; one of them specifically being morning sickness. Balancing the meridians can help alleviate, and in some cases eradicate, your nausea. This is why acupuncture can also be so helpful (acupuncture works specifically with your Meridians). Third Eye and Crown Opening (Delivery, Your Way) Two other Chakras that need to be open for an emotionally and physically healthy pregnancy and delivery are your Third Eye and Crown Chakras. Your Third Eye helps you to know that “the universe has a safety net” and that everything and everyone is safe no matter what the future may hold. Your Crown Chakra is your connector to Divinity and Inspiration. Having these opening and fully functioning help to ease any anxiety and fears you are having (specifically in regards to your pregnancy, baby and labor!). Clearing and opening these Chakras helped me to be very specific about how I wanted to manage my pregnancy and labor and delivery. I felt very grounded and secure in my choices which was HUGE for me. Affirmations, Meditating and Yoga Positive Affirmations have an amazing ability of shifting energy. I always am giving women things to affirm in pregnancy in my sessions because they can do their own mini (or not so mini!) energy sessions on themselves. Plugging in these affirmations through phone reminders, index cards on your mirror, meditating on a specific one as your mantra, or doing yoga with your affirmations as your theme can create massive, positive energy shifts. Here are a few examples: -I am confident in my body's ability to carry a baby -My body knows how to birth this baby, just as it knew how to grow this baby -I am confident in my body's ability to have a healthy pregnancy -I birth with ease -I am confident that my baby and I will have all of the nourishment we need throughout the entire pregnancy -I am surrounded by loving and nurturing support -I am confident in my healthcare professionals to give me the care and help that I need -My body is wise and knows how to carry and deliver this child I hope that everyone who reads this looks into a bit of Energy Healing and Balancing for help in their pregnancies. My door (or more likely email and phone) are always open and I’d love to answer any and all questions my fellow mamas may have! Love, Mally **Have you used energy work for help conceiving, during your pregnancy or postpartum? Let us know what your experience was in the comments below!** If you know Lindsay and myself AT ALL you know how we loooove to be able to tell our clients about the endless options they have for pregnancy and birth. The more options available the better! That's the beauty of empowered birth... knowing all your options and making your own choices! Well, we have a great new option in the area! Brigham City now has a LICENSED birth center!!! Are you looking for a middle ground between hospital and home? Are you wanting a beautiful ambiance to bring your baby earthside in? Are you wanting to be able to bill your insurance for your birth? If so, this may be a fantastic option for you! Here are what a few mommas have had to say about Mermaid Birth on their FB page! "The Cadillac birth package with Cadillac midwives!!!! Not only do they truly care about you but they are highly skilled and supportive! They listened to me and what kind of birth I wanted, and were amazing at my birth! Also, their postpartum care is so wonderful, unlike any other! They care so much about you and your baby! I couldn't have asked for any better! I will be returning to them for every baby I have, thank you Mermaid Birth for helping and guiding me threw my birthing experience! Highly recommend them!!!!!" -SC "I have wanted to have a home, underwater birth for many years but my husband was always concerned for safety. Well, we finally found the right combination! Mermaid Birth gave me the wonderful support to experience the birthI wanted and the skilled staff to provide safety for me and my baby that my husband wanted. Thank you so much for your service. It is what I have always wanted and more." -SY "The best care from the minute I walked into their birth center. We had an amazing, powerful and supportive home birth. Pampered and spoiled the whole way and postpartum care is extraordinary! Every visit was filled and were available every step of the way !! I love each and everyone of them, the best team!!" -AM Sounds intriguing, right?! Take a guided tour of their newly licensed birth center here! https://www.dropbox.com/s/7k263rdrgts05c4/Guided%20tour.mov?dl=0 For more info visit: www.mermaidbirth.com You’re probably here because you’ve discovered you’re growing a little seed inside of your womb, congratulations! You are probably wondering what else you could be implementing into your life, that you haven’t already thought of. What better way to become knowledgeable and empowered, than to open a book! But what are THE best pregnancy books, when you have so many to choose from?! Books are a great way to become informed. You can find books on any topic of interest to you and a book to contradict everything you just thought you knew. That’s the thing about informing yourself through the writings of others. Some people resonate more with a book that is based in pure science, while others will base their beliefs around a book that they connected to on a more emotional or spiritual level. So, there’s no right or wrong way to choose a book, but when it comes to a matter of the heart, your best bet is to listen to yours. If you find a book that just isn’t cutting it for you during your pregnancy, don’t be afraid to put that one down and look for another one. We all know that “What to Expect” books are too cookie cutter for this day & age. We want evidence based facts, but we don’t want to be bombarded with science terms, boring statistics, or to feel like we are reading an encyclopedia! As us ‘Millennials’ continue to grow, become informed, and understand the impact that our pregnancy, labor, and birth experience, has on the family unit as a whole. We can become overwhelmed by the amount of information we have at our finger tips. It tends to muddy the waters when we are looking for the most accurate and evidence based information, to base our decisions on! So, we created a solution for our clients, a top list of the best pregnancy books to date! I considered taking a survey about what everyone’s favorite read was, but as a Doula who constantly has her nose in a book pertinent to her job, I felt knowledgeable enough to write this piece without assistance! However, feel free to add your favorite in the comment section below! This is a variety of books, some are more inspiring/spiritual, some are more basic/straightforward, some are everything you ever needed to know, and some are just good old fashioned uplifting birth stories! Here ya go... · The Birth Partner by Penny Simkin – This book is great for the couple that is planning a hospital birth (or not) and wants to know all there’s to know about ALL.THE.THINGS. Don’t let that frighten you though. It may be big, but it’s an easy to read book, and something that you can go back to reference while in labor! It also gives tips for the partner, information about Doulas and what a Doula might do. Written by the childbirth queen herself. · The Natural Pregnancy Book By Aviva Jill Romm M.D. & Certified Professional Midwife – This book is an excellent read if you’re starting earlier in your pregnancy, and even if you aren’t. If you’re looking for a more holistic approach to your pregnancy and birth, with nutritional information to ensure you and your baby’s optimal health, or to get rid of some common pregnancy complaints. It also includes; short chapters on exercise/movements, pelvic health, coping/relaxation techniques, emotional changes, celebration ideas, and common concerns in pregnancy. It is another easy to read, easy to reference, book. It isn’t too alternative, but right in the middle. She is brilliant! · Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth - This is that “good old fashioned” compilation of inspirational birth stories type of book. Written by the Nation’s leading Midwife, Ina May Gaskin. The stories are heartfelt, uplifting, reassuring, exciting, and sweet. If you’re feeling unsure or frightened about your upcoming labor day, this one is sure to leave you feeling empowered! · The Complete Book of Pregnancy and Childbirth – By Sheila Kitzinger It is one of those books with a little bit of everything. From common procedures through pregnancy and labor, physical and emotional well-being, what to expect in labor, coping with the pain, gentle birth, newborn information, and much much more. It is also very basic and unbiased. It contains wonderful and supportive information, though some of it may be a little more outdated (I have the revised Fourth Edition), and it contains real pictures and plenty of visuals. It is however less holistic than some of the others. · Birthing From Within- By Pam England or Rob Horowitz. Are you more of the artsy type? If so, this book is definitely for you. No? Well this book can still be for you! They even have a curriculum that some Doulas teach, which you can find more about here https://www.birthingfromwithin.com/ Art can be therapeutic for some, especially if you’ve had a traumatic previous birth experience. Even if you haven’t, it is a great way to release fears and have an inside look at what your brain is trying to tell you. It isn’t just about drawing though, it is about looking at birth from a different perspective. It doesn’t have all of the medical advice, what certain tests/procedures are, or what to expect, but nonetheless it is still great for those of you who are struggling with the fears surrounding pregnancy & birth. · Hypnobirthing: The Mongan Method – By Marie Mongan Even if you aren’t planning a birth using the Hypnobirthing techniques outlined in this book and partnered with a class, I have still included the text because it is a book filled with great information for coping! It might not have the educational aspect of what you can expect from tests, procedures, and common complications BUT it almost like having a common-sense guide to how labor works and how to cope. Plus, it comes with a CD that is quite relaxing! So if you already trust in your body’s ability to give birth and you just need some education on how to have a successful unmedicated birth, than this one is right for you! |